Becoming a member of the 21st century

I realize this is my young, urban bias speaking here, but in my view, anyone who is not proficient in both email and cell phone use is clearly out of touch and should be deported to eastern Europe to raise sheep. (Jury's still out on text messaging, that's one I haven't fully grasped yet.) My parents are attacking this from opposite ends: my mother owns a cell phone that is gradually filling the role a cell phone should (glorified leash) but is clueless with respect to email (she may even still refer to the internet as the World Wide Web... ::shudder::), and my father uses email daily at work but absolutely refuses to get a cell phone.

Since my mother owns a cell phone and has already perfected the art of keeping tabs on her husband, there's no need to persuade my father to get one. (Attempts would be likely welcomed with a tirade on how our world is going to hell or some such thing, and I can't say I disagree, but the effort simply wouldn't be worth it.) I find it just this side of shocking, however, that my mother doesn't know how to email someone (you'd think a socialite like her would be up on the latest ways to communicate with people, but apparently not). Therefore I've spent the last three years or so campaigning to get my mother to use and understand "the internets" and email. I walked her through signing up for a Yahoo! account, because I think AOL is evil. I bought her The Internet for Dummies for Christmas, along with a gift certificate to Amazon.com (clever eh? eh?) I met with modest success while I was living abroad and email was the only way to communicate with me that didn't cost anything. However, even then there wasn't much incentive for her to use email much since the only one who ever wrote her was me. And I wasn't going to say anything important because God knew when she might actually read it.

I kind of gave up. There's no point forcing someone to use something that is of no value to them in their daily life. But now that's changed. My parents belong to a country club where apparently the rest of the membership has been up on this crazy email thing, and now it's actually necessary for her to use it from time to time. I was so happy when she asked for help with downloading an attachment. I was so proud when she knew what a .pdf was. And now, it's all coming back to bite me on the ass. Today, she sent me a forward.

I can only pray she passes out the 'forwards are cool' stage speedily. Hopefully a few well-chosen words from me (along the lines of "forwards suck and anyone who perpetuates them should be taken out and shot--oh, um, let me explain what a forward is...") will do the trick.

Standard time

really sucks. It's really nice to get that extra hour, particularly after a Saturday night Halloween celebration, but now it's 4:30 and streetlights are already on. By 5, it'll be dark! I feel like I should be checking Sunday night TV listings really buckling down on my homework in preparation for tomorrow (ew, I hate Sundays). I guess I'm just mad because it was such a gorgeous day out today and I feel cheated that it's over so soon. Not that I really went outside much, but like, I totally would've if the sun was going to be out longer. Seriously.

Fall colors: red or blue?

How I love this time of year: every American gets a chance to flex their democratic muscles and vote for those causes and candidates they believe in, or for the ones all their friends believe in, or at least not vote for the ones they really dislike, or just make a pretty pattern with the bubbles on the ballot the way you do when you already know you're going to fail a multiple-choice test because you have absolutely no idea what all these measures are or why Lori Jones would make a better judge than Gus Gomez but you've seen those signs that say "Vote or Die" and you're going to vote, dammit. You're an American and you're going to exercise your right to inflict your ignorance of the issues you're voting on on the rest of your fellow citizens. You were kind of suckered into it anyway; you thought you were just voting for a presidential candidate and have been agonizing over that decision for, like, almost ten minutes. Nobody said anything about having to have an opinion on other stuff, too.

I think Get out the Vote efforts are a step in the right direction, but they still fail to fix the problem of youth complacency. Sure, now they'll vote, but they still don't know what for. As a de facto member of the "whatever" party, I wonder why it is I don't care. I've come up with a few reasons (aside from my general bent towards contrariness):

1. I have no idea what's going on.

2. When I try to change that, there's way too much information to wade through.

3. In addition to just trying to absorb all this information, I have to a. determine its trustworthiness, and b. suppress my desire not to run from anything depressing / disillusioning / frustrating / angering, as I rarely experience any other emotions when reading about politics.

4. I get the impression that, even if I was well-versed in all these issues and had an opinion I could back up on most of them, what I think still doesn't matter, and nor does my vote.

The end result: I get my news from friends whose intellect and opinions I respect, as they have already filtered the information for me. I vote because I know I should. And when I filled out my ballot, I asked my parents for guidance on how to vote (aka "so how did you vote I'll do that too") for the various offices, measures, etc. Not too bad, I suppose, but it pales in comparison to the dream of real involvement that we envision for ourselves.

On the upside: I'm so glad Halloween is close enough to Election Day to distract us from all this. It was a lot more fun thinking about costumes than about issues that seriously affect our future.

Silver lining?

So I'm sick and can't sleep. I don't know what the hell that's all about, but whatever--it's giving me time to continue to plan my trip Australia. I got my Oz Lonely Planet on Tuesday and have been reading it ever since, and just get more excited the more I learn (my trip is now expanding to take up, like, 6 months so I can cram in all the stuff that sounds cool).

So there are two challenges to this, really: 1. figuring out what to do, and 2. figuring out how to get there. The latter is disappointingly not talked about in depth in any guidebooks (for good reason, I guess, given how often and how much airfares can change, but when flying to the other side of the world, I could use some pointers on how to do so for a decent price), and has been a constant subject during class web-surfing. And tonight, I found a site with a package so good that it solves all my airfare dilemmas... and that kind of creeps me out. The company is called Air Brokers International, and if you're planning some sort of massive around-the-world trip like I am, this is the place to go. After hanging around on student travel sites, Australian airline sites, and Travelzoo, the best deals I've been able to come away with are still only round-trip, from LAX to Sydney, for about $1200 (I've ceased to flinch at that number--that's how long I've been researching this). This does not include stops in New Zealand or the South Pacific, and when I tallied up all that airfare (plus just the bits needed to get around Australia), it came out to about $2400. On this website, I found a trip where the comparable airfare cost was only about $50 or so less, but in addition to Australia, flights to Hong Kong, Bangkok, Bali, NZ, and Tahiti are included. I haven't been able to close my mouth for about an hour (although the stuffy nose has something to do with that, too).

And despite my suspicions, this business appears to be pretty well validated. I checked it on the BBB website, and they've been in business for 17 years and have a good record, and only 3 complaints have been filed in the last 3 years.

So now I'm absolutely dying to just plan and book this trip already. Like I'm gonna get any sleep now.

How to plan and run group meetings

1. (optional) Determine the necessity of meeting. Looks something like this:

Group Member A: So, do we need to meet soon?

Group Member B: Well… (attempting to walk the fine line between being a team player and “I’d rather have an asshole on my elbow”) …I’m not sure there’s anything we need to discuss.

Group Member A: But we have a professor meeting next week.

Group Member B: Oh, um… (decides suggesting that everyone BS the meeting is out)… ok.

Group Member C: I’ll bake cookies!


2. Determine a meeting time. Looks something like this:

Group Member A: When’s everyone free?

Group Member B: I have some time tomorrow.

Group Member C: Tomorrow’s no good, I’ve got meetings all day--oh, except for a break between 1 and 3. Can we do between 1 and 3?

Group Member B: I have class from 1 to 3.

Group Member A: What about the day after?

Group Member B: Can’t do it, have class in the morning and an interview in the afternoon.

Group Member C: Thursday?

Group Member A: I’m free Thursday morning. I have yoga in the afternoon.

Group Member B: Can’t do Thursday morning, I have ballet. I’m free Thursday afternoon, though.

Group Member C: Huh. Uh, when are you done in the afternoon?

Group Member B: 5.

Group Member A: Meet from 5 to 8?

Group Member B: Dude, I hate meeting at night.

Group Member C: Yeah, nights suck.

Group Member A: Well what about Friday?

Group Member C: Friday?

Group Member B: Yeah, ew.

Group Member A: Well we need to meet sometime!

Group Member B: Ok ok ok. I’m free all day next Wednesday.

Group Member C: I have an interview in New York that day.

Group Member B: I have a couple hours break two Thursdays from now.

Group Member C: Rock climbing at the gym. The following Tuesday?

Group Member B: Stress relief seminar. How about--

Group Member A: Look, whatever. We’ll just do our work and then email each other.

Group Members B & C: Sweet!


3. Meet. Looks something like this.

Group Member A: So... what's up?

Group Member B: I'm so tired.

Group Member C: Me too.

Group Member A: Does anyone remember what we're supposed to be working on?

Group Member B: Um, didn't someone write up a list last time?

Group Member C: I thought you were doing that.

Group Member B: Oh yeah. Hold on, I have to find it.

Group Member A: So how was your weekend?

Group Member C: Good. Saw Garden State--that's a great movie.

Group Member B: Oh, I've really been wanting to see that! I suggested it Friday but the guy I was with wanted to go to an improv show instead.

Group Member C: Omigod, did you have a date?!

Group Member B: Yeah, it was that guy I told you about last week.

Group Member C: Ooh, how'd it go?

:::::::::::: insert lots more gossip here ::::::::::::

Group Member B: Ok, I found the list. Ugh, I hate this assignment.

Group Member A: I know, it's so frustrating. I mean, it's like we have no guidance in actually getting things done.

Group Member C: Yeah, I feel like we haven't really learned anything yet, so how are we supposed to do this?

Group Member B: This is what I hate about group projects, we're expected to come back with something great but we never know what it's supposed to look like and so anything you present will just get criticized, and it's like, if you'd told us what we were supposed to do maybe we would have done it!

:::::::::::: insert lots more assignment/professor/class-bashing here ::::::::::::

Group Member C: Ok, seriously, let's just do this and get out of here.

Group Member A: Yeah. What was it we were supposed to have done for today?

Group Member B: Umm... you were supposed to research competition, you were supposed to research best practices, and I was supposed to start putting together a survey.

Group Member A: Ok, I started my part but didn't really get that far.

Group Member C: Oh thank God, me neither, I felt so bad. Did you get any work done on the survey?

Group Member B: Well, I kind of needed suggestions from you guys from your research to do it.

Group Member A: Ok, maybe we should all just split up and do some more work on our own, and we'll discuss next time we meet.

Group Member C: Cool.

Group Member B: So, are we going to meet soon?

Group Member C: Uh... when?

Costume conundrum

I'm really excited about Halloween this year. My parents will be in town, so no matter what, absolutely no work will get done and I'll be eating very well. I'm going to a Halloween party on Friday and going out on Saturday is a given, so it's going to be a packed weekend. But most of my excitement has crystallized around my costume idea--I think I've got a great one and am really looking forward to wearing it. The idea: Mia Wallace, from Pulp Fiction (Beatrix Kiddo's just too obvious. Plus there's no way I could pull off that yellow outfit.)

So how will you know I'm Mia Wallace? Well, I'm going to have a hypodermic needle stuck to my chest, pointing to a red dot, and will have the accompanying short black hair, white collared shirt, corset, black pants, nail polish, etc. (am going to pass on the bloody nose). I thought the hardest part of this would be the needle; that's taken care of. I own black pants and I'll be borrowing a shirt from one of my guy friends. However, the corset has proven troublesome.

I've kind of always wanted a corset and am glad to finally have an excuse to buy and wear one. They seem like such a commonly-owned item that I didn't think one would be hard to come by. They're not...unless you have any sort of specific criteria governing your purchase decision. A copy of the one in Pulp Fiction simply isn't possible, but just finding a black one that's the right size and shape is much harder than I thought. I spent several hours yesterday and today hiking around my neighborhood (it's one that has a lot of potential; Boystown is a block to the east and Belmont shops--think Melrose--are a couple blocks to the south), with no luck. The worst part is, since it's the kind of thing sold in lingerie stores and nowhere else, you have to choose your stores right, since it's kind of embarassing to ask for in the wrong type (and I have to ask, I simply lack whichever gene is necessary to find what you're looking for without aid).

I also spent a couple of hours surfing the internet as well, and have come to the conclusion that there must not be a whole lot of money in bustiers/corsets, because the selection is simply not what it should be. I was disappointed by the likes of Frederick's and Victoria's Secret, to say nothing of the oodles of other lingerie sites there are out there. Searches on Froogle, Shopping.com, etc. turned up very little. Not that there aren't lots of different kinds of corsets, but they were clearly designed with a particular demographic in mind: the trashy one.

I did finally find a corset with potential, and am going to pray that a. it arrives in time for Halloween and b. it actually fits when it does. If not, I'll be in the market for a new costume, one that hopefully utilizes all the stuff I already bought. All I've got thus far is a heroine-addicted flapper or a psychotic nurse with short black hair. Other ideas? Anyone? Anyone?

Google (v.)

As mentioned in a recent post, it appears people here have discovered I have a blog. When I first heard about this, I was shocked that anyone could even find it. I'd tried to do so via Google before and came up in the results three pages or so in. Well, no more. I Googled my full name and got my Ad:Tech Blog contribution right at the top, followed by this blog, and then the Adventist Development and Relief Agency (ADRA) listings start.

Googling a job applicant's name is becoming standard procedure, so it seems certain that most of the people I'll interview with are about to or have already seen my blog. They may not even get that far, though; I don't look like a very choice candidate just looking at the search listings. In the Ad:Tech Blog listing, my name is next to the "Monday Night Party Report," even though I didn't write it (circumstantial, really; I was certainly capable of doing so). Another Ad:Tech blog listing quotes my writing, selecting my oh-so-intelligent-sounding "Basically, yeah, it works." Following that you get a blog called EmptyThoughtBubbles, to really drive the point home. The next relevant listing is a post off Adrants titled "Adver-Wear: Another Excuse to Look at Breasts"; I sent in a link to an article about models wearing t-shirts with TV's in them that played commercials (these media people never cease to amaze) and Steve Hall's particular brand of writing augmented that story. The last listing that's clearly related to me is from the Journal of Integrated Marketing Communications. Assuming one gets that far, it's a small dose of credibility to make up for all the rest. I doubt it'll help though: JIMC is not on my resume, and while I think there are some good reasons for that (namely, priorities), it would appear I'm trying to hide a poor performance there, in addition to all the crap in the other listings.

The unlikely conclusion that I hope is drawn: The girl likes to write.